Adopting one or two?

"If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him."   -James 1:5

This is one of my favorite verses.   It is so helpful.   I used to have such a tough time making decisions.   I have some perfectionism tendencies towards making the best decision.

I remember as a child, I wrestled with this so much.   One time I didn't get a souvenir at a shop we were visiting-simply because I could not choose.  It seemed best to go without-then to try to decide any longer.

I thought it was such a curse to be indecisive.   However, once I was introduced to this verse, and started applying it- I realized indecisiveness is one of the biggest blessings of my life.

"Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 
- 2 Corinthians 12:10

God teaches us best- when we seek Him.

And God doesn't mind if I pray about the simplest, silliest decisions, and ask for wisdom.   How do I  know?   Because He answers them.   Always.
Really, all of our prayer requests are small to God anyway.   So it doesn't matter if it seems big or small to us...He'll answer it either way.

Back on 6/6, I posted about how God showed me that I needed to pray before even considering adopting a second child.   And so we prayed, and I asked others to pray....asking for wisdom.

It's easy to want to make an emotional decision.   Orphans need homes-most of the time their lives depend on it.   And my own reasoning also says- it is cheaper to adopt two at once.

I was talking to God about it again, and I saw a sorta of image in my mind.  It was like when you wear sunglasses and they are just a little lower on your eyes.  So the top 10% was clear and the lower 90% of my vision was gray.
And the thought that came to my mind was: this is how much the adoption is going to affect Iana.

Then the realization really hit me...of how much all of this will affect Iana's life.   I realized how flippant I had been about this decision in her regard.   I had been focused on the needs of the children we were receiving information about, and contemplating the financial aspect instead.

Iana is an only child.  She has never experienced siblings.   She will be tremendously affected by this new addition- as all first born children are.   She has always had Ken and I to herself.  We are her favorite people.   Her toys will be shared.   Her room will be shared.  Her parents will be shared.   This is a HUGE change.   Almost everything in her life will be changed.

And while I can say, more children need a home, and that is so true.   I do also need to take care of the child that I do have.   Iana will adapt better to having one sibling added at a time.   Elsa will also do better having more attention, especially with being blind and needing more teaching.  Iana and Elsa will have an easier time bonding if it is only them.

So, right now, we feel that God is showing us to adopt one child only.   Little Elsa.   Perhaps some day we will adopt more.  It's up to Him to decide.

Iana did tell me the other day with great enthusiasm..."After we go and get Elsa, then we go back and we get MORE Elsa's!!" 

So maybe some day there will be more.  

However, for today, I am thankful that I have a Heavenly Father that gives me wisdom when I ask.   And also a Heavenly Father that cares very specifically about little Iana too.

Waiting for our I-797 and Orphanage update

(Sung to the tune of Sailing, Sailing...)    Waiting, Waiting...Waiting for our 797....


We just got some new pictures of our little Elsa from the orphanage!!   I don't know how I can miss her so much- when I have never seen her in person.

She is so adorable.   I have the song "You must have been a beautiful baby" in my head.  :)

(I have to wait to post pictures until later.)

I really like anything sheep related...lambs....so adorable.   When we bought our house there was a sheep in the stain-glass window above the door.   My husband said, "See this house is for us, there is even a sheep above the door!"

In the pictures of Elsa, she is sitting in a little sheep walker.    so sweet.

The books I have been reading about raising a blind baby have been so encouraging and helpful.    One of the suggestions is about warning them before you pick them up-so they aren't startled.    It's kind of like if someone hugs you from behind-if you don't know they are coming-it can make you jump!    Same with the little ones that don't see you...so you are supposed to let them know that you are going to pick them up before doing so.

Anyhow, the book also talks about how delayed a blind baby often is, and we also have heard how far behind children in orphanages can get, and well I figured when we got there, she would be about 2 years old- but probably she wouldn't even be sitting up.    They also talk about  how important it is to teach them to reach out-since they don't see anything-they often don't reach.   The authors kept saying how important it is to start early with a blind baby, teaching them things.  

After reading this, I was growing increasingly concerned that during this pivotal stage in life, that she would be falling more and more behind.

And then in one of the pictures we just got..it shows her standing up... walking... while gripping her helper's hand to pull her along too.   Her hand is outstretched in front, reaching out.

They say a picture is worth a thousand words.   

Wow, what a blessing that picture was to receive!  :)

"Like cold water to a weary soul,
So is good news from a distant land."
Proverbs 25:25

**Pictures added to this post on 1/8/2014 after we got our LOA-these are the ones from Sept**

God's Design-Addendum-There is more to be seen.

After I wrote the blog entry entitled "God's Design", which gives verses regarding how God has designed the blind and the lame, I heard a Pastor on the radio.   The Pastor said that when people are facing something difficult, they don't need facts about God's sovereignty, they need hope.  

And I realized that although it is important for my own heart to state that God is in charge-a heart that weeps over a special needs situation doesn't always feel better with those verses.

So here is what I should have included.

When God allows blindness, or any physical struggle, it's limited to our time here on Earth.    

It is not forever.

Taken from Isaiah 35:5-10

"Then the eyes of the blind will be opened
And the ears of the deaf will be unstopped.
Then the lame will leap like a deer,
And the tongue of the mute will shout for joy....

A highway will be there, a roadway,
And it will be called the Highway of Holiness....
the redeemed will walk there,
And the ransomed of the Lord will return
And come with joyful shouting to Zion,
With everlasting joy upon their heads.
They will find gladness and joy,
And sorrow and sighing will flee away."

And also Revelation 21:4-6
"And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.'
Then He who sat on the throne said, 'Behold, I make all things new.' And He said to me,  Write, for these words are true and faithful.'
And He said to me, 'It is done! I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. I will give of the fountain of the water of life freely to him who thirsts. "

This time now on Earth, seems so encompassing.  It's all we remember.   It's all we know.  

But in Heaven our lives on Earth will seem very distant, a very far away memory, and then eventually it will be forgotten.

Isaiah 65:17
"For behold, I create new heavens and a new earth; And the former shall not be remembered or come to mind."

This time on Earth is actually so very very short.

2 Corinthians 4:17
"For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory..."

Compared to eternity, our lives here are just a "moment".  

These struggles-they seem so indefinite.   But they are really only for a moment.

God does make, and does allow physical disabilities in this life.   But they are allowed for a just a moment.

God has a plan.  It's just a moment.   You just have to hold on, and carry on.  

Some day the physical suffering will be long over, a distant memory.

There is a special blessing for those in this life who have been unable to walk, or unable to see- to be able to walk and see in heaven.  What a joy that will be for someone tied to a wheelchair during their lives, to not only walk, but run and leap in heaven.   For those that have difficulty even talking- to speak freely.

What a blessing it will be not only for them, but for those who love them, to watch.  

The best meal is after being famished.   And the best joy is after suffering.

Your heart is going to sing some day Mama, when you see your child in heaven with a new body and so happy.

My happiest moments are when I see my daughter rejoicing.   The joy that I feel over her happiness tops any joy that I can feel on my own.

I can not imagine the joy that a mom will feel to see her child set free at last.   In that sense, I think there will be an extra special blessing for the moms, dads, families and friends that love these little ones who suffer from special needs in this life- to see them rejoicing in heaven.

As God is our heavenly Father, and our feelings towards our children teach us how He thinks and feels towards us,  I think He will be rejoicing to see their happiness even more so.

It will be beautiful to watch.    Keep teaching your children about Jesus.  

Just wait, and you will see.